smackdown!

The first, and hopefully annual, Southern Smackdown took place last Monday night at East Coast Grill. Three chefs go head to head to see who reigns as the Southern Food King of Cambridge. The line-up:

 ~ Chef Rembs Layman from Tupelo

~ Chef Jason Heard from East Coast Grill

~ Chef Barry Maiden from Hungry Mother

Now, I am privileged to live so near to these three fine establishments that, if need be, I can stumble home. Which has happened. Only if need be!! When I first read about Smackdown, I squealed and dialed the reservation line so quickly it was as if I was 13 again, calling KZZP for free tickets to The Cure. Reservation made for six, I sat back and waited on pins, needles and extra squats at the gym for the night to arrive.

And, arrive it did. With fervor. Nine courses. Nine.

Two appetizers and an entree per chef appeared before us on a blue menu which also acted as a scorecard. Each course, or round, had a specific designation. There was a lot of food coming our way, good thing I was hungry. Also, good thing they served us an amuse-bouche as my table-mates and I were 2.5 drinks down by this point.

The amuse-bouche , which is usually quite small by nature, was a plate of appetizers in itself. But, hey, the theme is Southern - do you really think that anyone there would let us go hungry for long? Cubes of fried grits, house-made (which house? no idea) cheddar cheese sticks, deviled eggs with whipped chicken liver and a thick, tender Ritz-cracker-like thing topped with pimento cheese each made their way over my tongue and into infamy. Those cheese sticks were so flaky, like Butterfinger flaky. They were what Cheez-its aspire to when they are born.

Round 1: The South of the Past

She-Crab Soup with Sherry & Roe

Chunky, sea-sweet crab and the pop of roe permeated the buttery soup. Think New England Chowdah thick...but I was actually really surprised by how the texture of the broth, while heavy and creamy when I first put it in my mouth, left a clean palate when I swallowed. Almost as if it completely disappeared. This was, by far, my favorite in the entire round. I resisted the urge to lick the bowl. Really, I really did.

BBQ Rib with Pickled Watermelon & Hush Puppy

The meat on the rib was okay. The sauce on the rib was okay. Independently, okay. Together, relatively disappointing. I wasn't expecting to jump up on the table and do a tap dance with delight, but I was expecting a memorable rib, at the least. Well, it was memorable: I remember it was boring. The pickled watermelon rind was a hit at the table, with my co-judges chomping happily away. For me? It tasted too cinnamon-y. I commend the use of cinnamon. I do. But, well, this wasn't working for me. The plate's highlight was the hush puppy: lightly packed and crumbly on the inside, a dense and dark crust on the outside, it fell apart, in a good way, like a bubble when I tapped it with my fork.

Baked Stuffed Clam with Andouille & Cornbread

                         

Holy quahog, Dixie! What do we have here? I had a sizable piece of clam in every bite, and by sizable I mean about a quarter inch of bivalve flesh in every bite. The cornbread was coarse and didn't mush-out under the sauce or the lemon I squirted onto it while sweet piccalilli added a crisp and tart flavor that cut through the mellow, slow burn of the andouille. I ate the whole thing.

(before I ate the remnants)

Round 2: Down South Today

BBQ Beef over Jalepeno-Cheddar Grits & House Pickled Onions

 

When I think BBQ Beef, I think Texas. I think sweet, thick sauce that sticks to everything and takes a week to wash out from underneath my fingernails. That doesn't mean I like it, but I think of that scene when I read BBQ Beef. Thank God I was gladly proven wrong when this pile of tenderness was placed in front of me. The beef wasn't terribly sweet at all (score!) and the onions added an acidic punch that enhanced the gaminess of the meat. The grits were creamy, a little too creamy for my taste, but the watercress was a fine and crunchy accompaniment. Everyone at our table was quiet, a compliment to the chef as we are known to be loud.

Whole Roasted Smithfield Ham with Sweet Potato-Buttermilk Biscuits & Preserved Fig Jam

                          

'Samiches! Biscuit 'samiches! House-cured ham on a tender sweet-potato-y biscuit, who can go wrong with that?  Usually a favorite of mine (okay, yes, I have had this before and therefore totally knew which chef this was from), with a meat that shreds in my mouth and a fig jam that brings out the smoky flavor - this time the ham was salty. Yeah, I know, ham is supposed to be salty. But this? I felt like running into the kitchen and yelling "Chef X, do I look like a deer? Do you think I need a salt lick?" But of course, I didn't. I wrote it on my scorecard instead.

Pork Sausage with Sea Island Red Peas & Sunchoke Pickle   

The sausage had  a cool, mellow allspice flavor to it and the meat wasn't too packed in and dense, giving it a light feeling when I bit. The red peas had a flavor to themselves and were cooked to the point of holding their form; when eaten separately, both stood out as quite good. Put both in a bowl together, though, and I hated the product. The combined textures were off, with the peas being slightly too hard for a stew and the sausage being slightly too soft.

Round 3: The Future of Southern Food

(the FUTURE!!!)

Sous Vide Colonial Fried Chicken with Gravy and Biscuit

Anyone who knows me probably knows at least one thing: I LOVE FRIED CHICKEN. Freaking LOVE FRIED CHICKEN. So much, in fact, I ate a half of one after I ran a half marathon this fall. It was a prize for myself, okay? This fried chicken was sad. It was crying in my mouth. Actually, I wish it had started to cry in my mouth, it would have added a little welcome salt to an otherwise bland, crunchy breast. Fried chicken without salt or pepper in the breading or on the meat? That isn't Colonial, that's Communist. The biscuit was perfect, it flaked off in long, round pulls. But that doesn't make up for the Red Threat of that chicken. An American to the core, I gave it back.

(At this point in the evening, my arteries are in revolt. K is taking a power nap. J looks like he has "gone inside" his own mind, taking deep breaths and mumbling to his stomach to hurry up and digest, there's more coming. C is asking the waiter for toothpicks - for her eyes. Mr. Bacon is his normal self.)

Smoked & Braised Pork Belly with Cranberry-Hot Pepper Jelly & Buttermilk Grits

                                    

I love it when my food moves when it's placed on the table. This time, the jelly on top went one way and the pork belly jiggled in a completely opposite direction. Jelly Belly, to the fullest. The belly was quite fatty, but I ate the small amount of meat along the bottom and was happy with the smoky flavor. The jelly added sweet heat, and the grits...oh those grits! Separating in my mouth, they left a creamy and buttery feel without being mushy at all. I was sad I couldn't eat the rest of the belly due to fattiness factor (read: all fat).

Roasted Duck Gumbo with Sweet Potatoes and Wild Rice

                                    

Here's how you can tell I am not a Southern belle: I don't like gumbo. Not the file, not the dark roux, not much of it at all. But this gumbo, well, it was different. Each and every component of it was dead-spot-on  how it should be: the roux was deep and flavorful without overpowering the rest of the ingredients, the sweet potatoes were firm without being mushy or hard, the rice held up in the broth without sogging out and the duck held it's roasted flavor, which in turn made the whole bowl gamey without being fatty. It still wasn't my favorite, but I voted for it by sheer execution alone. If I liked gumbo, I know I would have licked THIS bowl.

After the scorecards were tallied, the results were in: Chef Rembs of Tupelo swept all three categories! His Baked Stuffed Clam, BBQ Beef and Roasted Duck Gumbo were the unanimous winners. Way to go Rembs!!

I still need a nap from it.